For those of you following the whole GED saga, the GED Testing Service made a surprising announcement earlier today: the new, computer-based test being rolled out in 2014 will not only be computer based, but will only display correctly on high-definition, 3D-capable screens of at least 27 inches in diameter.

Adult education programs—and many states—have already expressed concerns over the switch to computer-only testing, and this news will likely fan the flames of discontent even more. (Some states have already announced plans to replace the test with another exam.)

GED Testing Service officials noted that the screen size/resolution is necessary in order to properly display the full range of content planned for the new test.

“Last we checked, the real world was both in color and in high def,” officials said. “Without these changes, employers will have no way of knowing whether potential employees can work in such environments.”

Asked why the displays would need to be 3D-ready, officials noted that the Center on Education and the Workforce at Georgetown University estimates that by 2017, nearly 73% of all jobs will require experience using and manipulating objects in three dimensions, which means that future versions of the exam will need to take that into account. “The old paper-and-pencil GED is part of the past,” they said. “I mean, does anyone even know where you can go to buy pencils anymore? The new infrastructure we’re putting into place today looks forward towards a Minority Report-like future, where you can just point and wave your hands at the screen, and stuff happens.”

“The existing test is so putridly and disgustingly out of date we can hardly stand to look at it without becoming slightly nauseous,” officials continued. “And then we realized that even our original designs for the revised computer-based version were kind of out-of-date too. With the new technical requirements we are announcing today, adults without a high school diploma—especially those who already own a set of 3-D goggles—can be confident that we’ll be rolling out the kind of exam that will prepare them for work, college—and beyond. Putting off these changes would only result in another generation of individuals denied the opportunity to prepare for the increasing number of jobs that exist outside the old, black & white, 2-D world of the past.”

In related news—which, like the above, is not as good as last year’s—the Center on Education and the Workforce also announced today that by the year 2030, the majority of jobs in the U.S. will require not only college, but a Ph.D. and “at least some” astronaut experience.